'In the Court of the Crimson King' Part Two:

There seem to be references to the numerological significance of the number five in the work: five pieces, five members contributing to the writing, instances of cycles of fifths both at large and small scale positioning. Five is a magical number. It is the number of confusion and quarrel, and of intense vibration. It represents the fusion of the mortal body to the discipline of the spiritual. The pentacle has power as a talisman of protection. Occult symbols include that of the Hierophant whose right-hand fingers are held with the first two bent, the next two straight and the thumb not seen (see inside cover of ITCOTCK). Five is the number of fire, strife, competition andlight. It is regarded as the number of eveil, but also of light. The ancient chinese also included five elements in their cosmology.

Each of the pieces may be symbolic of each one of the members of King Crimson, although I would not like to hazard a guess as to which one equals which member.

Another small-scale example of 'five': the chorus of 'I Talk to the Wind' has five attacks in sub-phrases 1,2 and 5. The phrases of the chorus are also broken down into five sections. 5 03/30/2000 A day of very hard work: a) teaching (hello to H.M.!); b)finalising and proof-reading the brass parts of the Concerto; c) phone conversation with Diane at DGM; d) writing odd ramblings about 'In the Court of the Crimson King' ('I Talk to the Wind', in particular) which was mailed to Sid, hopefully to arrive tomorrow.

Finished teaching at 17-50 and collected Sue. Went for a swift half at The Mount. The Lake District fells are distinctly visible this evening from the Fleetwood promenade, and bathed in bright sunlight, with the sunlight glistening on the sea.

An analysis of 'In the Court of the Crimson King' cannot possibly be included whole as it is simply too complex. I have decided to present some of these things as a series over the next few days. First, I will deal with structure and tonality, and then go on to talk briefly about 'number', alchemical ideas which may be applied to the work, before concentrating on 'I Talk to the Wind'. Other things may also come to mind in the meantime.

ITCOTCK is like a giant symphonic work in five movements, unified by a rising tone which is included as a localised event in 'I Talk to the Wind' (E-F# in the chorus) and 'Schizoid Man' (opening riff, Bb-C/F-G). This is reflected in the larger-scale structure as an ascending step from the opening C minor mode of 'Schizoid Man', to the final D major of '...Court'. The final 'Court' may be regarded as the resolution to the tension set up in the work.

Baroque imagery, included in Peter Sinfield's lyrics, is reflected in the ground-basses (Epitaph, E-D-A-B, which is Passacaglia-like), and the many instrumental obbligatos. Ritornello-like blocks are also included. These Baroque structural types may also have something in common with jazz and rock structural types, which include refrains or choruses. (I plan to discuss the idea of Medieval/Baroque imagery later.)

Baroque 'affect' (where keys are associated with psychological states) seem to be employed. I am unsure as to whether this was originally intended. For example, 'Schizoid Man' is in C minor/mode (tragic) (Purcell's 'Dido...' begins in C minor); '...Wind' is in E major (pastoral-like); 'Epitaph' is in E minor/mode (lamenting); 'Moonchild' is in A minor/mode-A major pentatonic (pastoral); 'Court' is in D major (triumphant), but also utilises E minor/mode, which projects backwards to 'Epitaph'. The pitch 'E' seems to extend throughout the work as a Schenkerian background, of sorts.

Looking more closely, the keys of the songs/pieces are: C minor (bVII to the tonic D major of 'Court'); E major (II to D major); E minor (ii to D major or V/V to the following...); A minor/major (V); D major (I). It seems to me that the idea of the number 5 (discussed next) may also be present in this harmonic framework, with the seeming emphasis on cycles of fifths included in both large-scale structure as well as in the minutiae of the localised harmonic events (i.e. chords).

4 03/29/2000 A bright, sunny day. Slept till 9-00, the result of completing the initial fair-score of the piece yesterday, and marking two student orchestrations.

Also began to look at something Sid Smith has requested: a brief analysis of 'I Talk to the Wind', which is leading me into an analysis of the complete 'In the Court of the Crimson King'. Already found out one or two interesting things apropos the work, particularly the keys associated with the number 5, a prominent idea on the album (?), which I delved into last evening. Will continue with this for an hour this morning before journeying to Liverpool, then continue this evening. Try and prepare this for Sid, and for the Diary, over the next couple of days.

Been exercised recently about the concept of 'legitimation': how the written score can become a substitute for the actual music itself: i.e. the way the music looks on the paper is actually more important, for a composer at least, than the sound. This is certainly something I went through a number of years ago and, for me, has resulted in a slimming-down of musical means and greater respect for the listener. In academic musical circles (i.e. Universities and some Conservatoires) there has been a change of attitude in recent times, with composed music becoming...well, more musical! There was an article in The Listener a number of years ago by Geoffrey Wheatcroft stating that some of the recent past, and the present (which was then two years ago), was the first time in history that we are actually producing 'unmusical' Composers. I had to agree. The big problem with the postmodern ethos is that we create our own rules which, as far as I can see, means that anything is possible - good and bad - which actually means nothing definitive anyway, much in the same way as we might interpret morals. I also think that with the erosion of the 'sacred' dimension from many peoples lives, the arts and especially music (the tendency began during the Renaissance with the removal of music from the Quadrivium and its inclusion, instead, in the 'liberal' arts') no longer have a real function to play. Jung may have been right when he said the Renaissance was a time when man no looked 'up' (vertically) but 'sideways' (horizontally) and so began the age of exploration not of the 'sacred'/heavens but of the 'earth'. This is also observed in the painting of the time, with its emphasis on perspective rather than symbol. It's interesting to note that in recent years there has been renewed interest in the 'sacred' function of the arts.

3 03/28/2000 10-15 approx: the final double-barline was drawn at the end of the piece. Phew! Complete! 10-30 - 11-15: marked a student orchestration. Another one to look at this evening.

13-00 - 15-00: went through the piece to see if it all 'works'. Came across several (thousand) copying errors, and decided to repeat the climax, and place a D natural in the F# minor (minus a third) chord which follows. Altered some of the harmony in the section for the string trio alone, which makes more sense. The ending seems to work adequately well: the piece is in F# minor, but ends in C major with a slowly unfolding and widely-spaced chord on 'C' which includes D naturals and F#'s. C major is a tritone from F#: this reinforces the distance travelled in the piece - from Thanatos to Eros?

My progamme note for the Deal Festival reads:

My Piano Quartet (Reclaiming Eros) was inspired by Sir Philip Sidney's poem 'With how sad steps'. I had written a short setting of these lines some time earlier, and as I turned to the Piano Quartet commission the song continued to resonate, reinforced by several synchronicities, which seemed to confirm that I was on the right track in my choice of both material and subject-matter. The first section, besides being a huge anacrusis to the second section, is made from three types of music: a bell-like, ascending scale; dramatic octaves; moto perpetuo-like material. It is as though this material, besides including motives and harmonic elements drawn from the song, is searching for the lyricism found finally in the second section. The piece is dedicated to the Newbold Piano Quartet who, together with the Deal Festival, commissioned it with funds provided by South East Arts. It lasts for around thirteen minutes.

Candidates for the Assistant Director of Music have been interviewed today. Interviews for the Director of Music post happen on Thursday. It will be complete change of full-time personnel in the Dept. next year.

2 03/27/2000 Felt rather absent from the body today. Probably tiredness at this late stage of term. Reached page 27 in the fair-score, and bar 287, and only 16 bars remain to write. It's always a good feeling to be almost at completion, because one can then allow the unconscious to make adjustments. The slow, second half is cantando espressivo, whereas the first half is certainly more feroce. I think that the Eros concept makes itself felt?

Tonight is the final performance of the school 'production', and my parents are coming to it. Amazing to think that it's only just over a month since my father had the stroke.

Yesterday, drove to Knott End, and walked through the fields. Eventually emerged from them and walked along the old railway back into the village, where we ate scones with jam and cream, and drank tea. On the walk thought much about the Gnostic Gospels I've recently been reading. These scriptures are certainly more psychologically-based (inner/esoteric) whereas canonical scripture seems to be firmly planted in the everday (outward/exoteric). The 'myth' is also more complex: a series of heavens including a 'parent' (the 'prime-mover' in the language of St. Thomas Aquinas) who thought a secondary principle (Barbelo) who, in turn, emanated a series of 'aeons' who, in turn, emanated a further series of principalities one, of which, was Sophia (or wisdom). The feminine plays a large part in Gnostic myth. Ialdabaoth, the off-spring of Sophia, being arrogant, decided to steal the light, or the divine spark, from the Aeons which was eventually trapped in matter and, in turn, the human race. Ialdabaoth also said that he was a jealous god, and there were no other gods apart from him. I wonder if this is what really outraged the orthodox Christians? The incarnation of Christ seemed to be more to do with making people aware of their calling: to awaken and to retrieve the divine-spark within them, by calling them back to their place in heaven and the journey through life to it. The calling involves many kinds of discipline. It seems to me that a very thin divide separates orthodox Christianity from Gnostic Christianity. Some may ask, 'Why waste your time looking into this?' Answer: for me, understanding something about the Gnostic myth has been important for my further understanding of Jung's ideas which has some parallels with it. It is also important for a greater understanding of religio-cultural ideas.

E-mails from Sid Smith, and my old band colleague Brian Taylor.

1 03/26/2000 The clocks went forward last night, so instead of being 8-00 it's now actually 9-00. British Summertime is officially here, and the weather both yesterday, and today, is excellent. Temperatures are up, too.

Yesterday, Sue and I walked along some of the old railway from Condor Green to Lancaster. We could that see the Bluebells are almost ready to flower in the woods, and the Daffodils are now all mostly out. We haven't walked this way before: it's on the coast, and apparently the took goods to and from the port of Glasson Dock to Lancaster some three miles away. The Lake District fells, on the other side of Morecambe Bay, beckoned to us: 'come over, and walk on us', they seemed to be saying! We could see Pike O'Stickle quite clearly yesterday and the Scafells were also clear, as was the Helvellyn range - all old friends. On the return journey, we stopped and had a cup of coffee at 'Bob's Snack Attack', ate a chocolate orange bun and fed the birds, then stood on the old iron bridge and looked down into the river. Lots of sea-birds we couldn't identify.

The piece progressed well yesterday. The first section is almost complete, and today I should be able to get on with the slow section, or at least make a start on it. I've reached page 19. There were a lot of notes to write yesterday. Once it's all written-up, then it can sit on the piano for a week so I can wander around singing it, and return to it to pencil-in new ideas. At this stage more things happen, like bits are expanded/contracted, motives are examined and sometimes changed, or not, and more localised details are further transformed. At this stage I know the structure is sound. Then the parts are written-up, it's Xeroxed, bound, posted and launched.

The first performance of the school 'production' was an interesting experience last evening. The pianist was in London all day, and only arrived back in Blackpool at 19-00, due to a fault on the train. All the other players were worried. I said, 'don't worry he'll walk in at 7-25!' He walked through the door of Big School at 7-26, with four minutes to go to curtain-up. (I was wrong, and so were they.) Anyway, the show had been transformed from the dress-rehearsal of the previous evening, with an extra rehearsal on the afternoon prior to performance. It's all good fun! Played some jazz standards before the show. I'm certainly not a jazzer, so goodness knows how my interpretations must come over!

My parents are hoping to be at either tonight's or tomorrow's performances. My father continues to make an excellent recovery.

Bought the new edition of 'In the Wake of Poseidon' the other day. I thought I knew this work reasonably well, but there are details in 'The Devil's Triangle' which I haven't noticed before which seem to have been highlighted in this new edition. 'Poseidon': this would be one of the pieces I'd take to listen to if I had to on a mission to Jupiter, and be away from Earth for several years, probably along with '...the First Cuckoo' (Delius), 'The Planets' (Holst), 'Faire is the Heaven' (Harris), 'Ex Tenebris' (White Willow), 'Five Leaves Left' (Nick Drake), 'Larks' Tongues...' (King Crimson), 'Syrensong' (Simon Holt), 'Deva' (Nicola LeFanu), 'Pawn Hearts' (VdGG), '...Boomland' (T2), 'Ave Verum Corpus' (Byrd), Purcell in G minor (and other choral works by H.Purcell)), 'Like as the Hart' (Howells), 'Preludes-Book 1' (Debussy), 'Symphony 3' (Gorecki), 'A Blessing of Tears' (Robert Fripp), 'The Protecting Veil' (Tavener), 'Lento' (Howard Skempton). Some Clementi Piano Sonatas may be included, and some other contemporary music, but not exactly sure. A thought: 'Technique should be put in the service of expression. One can teach the former, but not the latter. Is this the reason why so much contemporary music falls on deaf ears?'

7 03/25/2000 A slow day with the piece yesterday. The first 'dip' in tempo was harder to negotiate than I imagined, and with a day full of teaching and a dress-rehearsal for the school 'production', it was hard to get the around it. However, finally managed it. Seems a little four-square. Is there anything wrong with four-square passages, when they are counter-balanced by more angular and strident rhythmic music? Maintain the conflict, and watch the 'third' emerge... . Still, now back into the faster music before the slow, lyrical second section which occupies the second half of the piece.

Received some photos of Sid's art-work. I like what he's produced: 'Quickening the Dead' and 'Off the Beaten Track' are particularly good. We'll know more about the way things will proceed with the CD over the next week.

First performance of the 'musical' this evening (19-30 start) and, quite possibly, a brief visit to Lancaster this afternoon. More or less completed 'Pathways into the Jungian World'. Some very interesting ideas have emerged from this, and what I've been doing with the piece has been reinforced by sychronistic twinnings, two of them coming directly from the book, as well as from the new statue of Eros which has been erected on the Fleetwood roundabout, which is a replica of the statue found in Piccadilly Circus. As I was beginning to think about the piece I should write for Piano Quartet last Christmas, the statue was in the process of being built. I was drawn to it again and must have driven around it a hundred times looking at it. Every time I came to it, after not seeing it for a couple of days, I had a strange 'feeling' within myself. The first thought was to call the new piece Eros, which I rejected out-of-hand as being too twee. As it eventually turned out it was EXACTLY the right title! Jacob Heringman's request for a setting of Sir Philip Sidney's 'With how sad steps, O Moon, ...that busy archer his sharp arrows tries..' was exactly 'right'. Jacob, of course, knows nothing about these two strange coincidences. Chance? Coincidence? Some would say, 'nothing but'. However, it depends largely on how we interpret these words. The ancient Chinese built an entire scientific system based on chance/synchronicity. History has proved they were not a backward civilisation. As for myself, I try and listen as carefully as possible to these directives from within/without.

6 03/24/2000 Yesterday got to page 16 of the fair-score. This point is the first real 'dip' in tempo, and the place where some of the thematic material from 'Sad steps' is spread over a wide expanse in the piano part. The original song is in E minor/mode, but in the Piano Quartet it's all been transposed into F# minor/mode. This is mainly for the sake of resonance. I have often favoured D minor/mode as a tonal area, but in this case not. The piece also includes the key signature of F# minor: I haven't employed key signatures in purely instrumental pieces for many years, although I consider it important for choral/vocal pieces to be 'in' keys. Again, it seems to confirm that things are changing with my composing. John Powell, of Bolton Chamber Choir, has recently said that he feels my music is becoming more 'audience-friendly'. There's much I could say positively and negatively about this, but I feel that the compositional languages of both mine, and many of my colleagues, is in a state of flux at this moment in time. It's as though the experiments of the early part of the last century have entered the collective consciousness (or unconscious?) to be used more freely, and certainly more spontaneously. For example, rather than employ 'serialism', say, or even Stravinsky's rhythmic techniques, composers adapt them for their own purposes when called for in pieces, often combining them with more 'traditional' compositional vocabularies. There is no longer one accepted language. At the DGM/Opus 20 'Hidden Streams' launch concert, the composer David Matthews remarked that we are now able to write any way we like: tonal, atonal, neo-tonal, serial, 'complexity', 'minimalism' etc. etc. My own compositional stance is to have techniques on stand-by to employ when called for.

Heard from Paul Sherman, the double-bassist of Opus 20. Gradually, things are developing for the recording of the Soundscape orchestrations which will feature Opus 20 playing orchestrations of Robert's Soundscapes. Bert is in the middle of the fourth transcription, which should be complete sometime during April. This one sounds as though it will be a real challenge. He says he may have to complete it 'on the road', during the next California Guitar Trio tour.

Yesterday, also talked to Diane about the release of my own CD. Speak again next week.

5 03/23/2000 Reached page 12 of the fair-score. The piece continues to transform, and feels 'right'. There is some very fast, pounding music balanced by the lyrical ending, which hasn't been reached yet. Had one or two ideas about the piano writing as I walked from the station last evening: one passage should be harp-like.

Managed to re-read the essay on alchemy and metaphor on the yesterday's journey. The author makes one very interesting point: between body and world lies the field of 'eros', the imaginal or neither/nor region. This is the central issue of alchemy: the tension of spirit and matter. There was no either-or for that age, but there did exist an intermediate realm between mind and matter. Does this place/non-place, form/no-form characterise itself in synchronistic moments? In other words, is synchronicity the 'visible' evidence of this other dimension, what jung would called the archetypal world or the 'collective unconscious' or, even, the pleroma of the Gnostics. My experiences point towards this possibility.

Also managed to read an interesting article about Sylvia Plath in the Guardian Higher Educational Supplement.

Accompanying for Associated Board exams today, and later playing guitar for a school musical production, then onwards with the piece. If all goes well, the fair-score may be complete towards the end of next week. Feel that enforced stops, on the piece, actually have the added advantage of providing points of reflection for what has been written previously. This enables questions to be posed and answers to be provided.

Later, phone Diane and leave an e-mail for Jacob Heringman to pick up on his return.

4 03/22/2000 6-20: back at the copying table. Piece progressing and changing.

Postman brings: a) bills which need to be paid; b) bindings of the full-score of Concerto 'Nekyia' and solo percussion part. Post them on to Evelyn and Diego later. Back to piece.

Time going on, and there is the weekly journey to Liverpool. Seems like the only time to sit and relax, and read is on the train. Read an excellent essay last eveing by Robert D. Romanyshyn: Alchemy and Subtle Boody of Metaphor. Re-read it today.

Also trying to sort the recording schedule for the Soundscape orchestrations. Should clarify soon.

3 03/21/2000 6-30: the piece continues to develop. At fair-score stage I feel sleep is isn't really an essential part of life. Reached page 8. Further ideas are coming in fast and furious.

9-00 - 10-30: teaching.

10-30: phone Diane. Speak further on Thursday. CD may be released sooner rather than later. Run to post-box, and post letters to David Matthews and Sarah Newbold with programme notes. Phone the binders, who have only just posted the Concerto full-score and solo percussion part.

10-40 - 11-15: teach A Level Composition student. she has written an excellent piece. Deadline next week.

12-15: lunch. Phone Paul Sherman for recording budget for Opus 20/Soundscapes project.

12-45 - 15-00: back to the piece. Quite an amount done. Feels 'right-ish'. Check flute, soprano sax and clarinet parts of Concerto 'Nekyia'. Xerox them. Check the remainder of the woodwind parts on Thursday, and the brass for further Xeroxing. These can then be bound.

15-00: teach I.B. Composition student. Two pieces down, one to go.

15-40: tea.

16-00: two flute students. I actually play some Faure and Gluck for one of the students. Accompany her for Grade 5 exam on Thursday.

17-20: phone Bert with details of recording budget.

17-30: Sue collects me in the car. Drive home, and to the Library to renew books: George Russell's 'The Lydian Chromatic Concept'.

This evening, phone Sid Smith and back to the piece. Roll on the holidays!

2 03/20/2000 An exciting day which has brought two indications of how the future may unfold.

9-30 - 14-30: teaching, but with two breaks the grand write-up of the piece was started at around 10-00. Each day has a 'target': usually around four pages of fair-score completed. By 20-00 today, the fourth page of fair-score has been reached. As I wrote today further ideas for the piece dropped into the mind.

15-00: called to see my parents, did some digging and helped Dad to plant flowers in the garden. My father has made a remarkable recovery.

17-45: telephoned Jacob Holm-Lupo.

20-00: David Matthews phoned wanting to know the title of the piece, to include in the Deal Festival programme. 'I've decided to call it Piano Quartet (Reclaiming Eros). It is set in tablets of stone. David has asked if I'll do a pre-concert talk, which I'll be pleased to do. The concert is on July 28th.

Nicholas has returned from Durham University for holidays. Christopher returns on Saturday.

1 03/19/2000 6-15 - 11-15: worked on the piece. Last evening added the ideas I jotted down on yesterday's train journey. This fits right at the outset. Also discovered the cello can be used in a more effective way to begin, partition and close the piece. In this way the cello line unifies the piece on a structural/melodic level. The mammoth write-up begins tomorrow and, no doubt, the piece will transform further during the process.

12-00 approx.: Linda phones. 'Are we going out?' Not a second thought: 'yes!' This is the final day for a good walk before the writing-up stage of the piece. Kevin and Linda meet us in Granada Services on the M6 at 13-15, and we head for Ings. There is a passage from Dorothy Wordsworth's Diary describing how she and brother William walked back through Ings, on their return from Yorkshire, although I can't remember the year, though it would sometime in the early nineteenth century. Now there is a new road system which bisects the village, but I've often tried to imagine which way they would have walked. Today I saw an old road slightly above the village on the Staveley side, with a very old moss-covered wall running by the side of it: is this the route they may have taken?

For us, there is a walk up to School Fell, which is around five miles from the car-park. At first, the weather is rather misty but as the afternoon goes on the sun comes out making a glorious Spring day. The fells always give of this wonderful smell: is it the vegetation or the sun on the peat? To put into words what one feels when out on the fells is difficult. It is, quite simply put, the place where we would live if we could. However, I fear if we did we'd never get any work done, so it's probably best not to at the moment. The day ends with a splendid meal at the Watermill Inn, and then drive home.

E-mails await at home, including one from Robert.

7 03/18/2000 A beautiful sun-filled day. From the window of the train one can see the greening fields, lots of new-born lambs, the trees in bud and the recently opening flowers. Spring seems, at last, to be on its way.

Some of the students' work, which I saw today, is very good. One of them brought along a new carol she's written, which is a beautiful piece. I couldn't really suggest anything...lost for words. Put a list on the notice-board for students to sign their names/titles of pieces for rehearsals for the Young Composers' concert. We have two rehearsals, early in May, then auditions and finally the concert on the 20th. One of the students has asked me to conduct his piece for voices, string quartet and tubular bell. Will think about it.

My own piece is transforming even at this late stage. It's come to the stage where not really very much more needs to be done in formulating actual 'sounds' at the piano. For example, on the train today several new ideas emerged as I re-read the essay 'Eros and Psyche'. A new title has emerged, and yesterday a sudden illumination: 'this piece is about the recovery of Eros'. The song ('Sad Steps'), which occupies the second half, is to with pure 'feeling'. The first half seems to be concerned with trying to find this: in other words, fragments of the songs, motivic and harmonic, are explored, as if searching for the 'wholeness' of the second half. It's as though the song is potentially deconstructed, and then re-built or perceived in a different way. I get the idea that, perhaps, there are four counterpoles of the psyche in operation in this: thinking and feeling; sensation and intuition. The first half is an anacrusis to the 'reality' of the second half. I came across the essay at the right time: in it, David Michael Levin makes the point that, in Jungian analysis, we experience both 'prepersonal' and the 'transpersonal' dimensions. By the 'prepersonal' he means that which we once knew in childhood, but lost in experiencing the environment. This may be through education, or simply growing up. The 'transpersonal' is that which lies beyond, which some may refer to in a variety of ways: the Self, God, Buddha, Jesus etc. In quoting Maurice Merleau-Ponty, Levin feels that the 'prepersonal' is none other than Eros, and thanks to that creative embrace we are constantly renewed with life by experiencing an incarnate belongingness, or an intertwining which intensifies all relationships and creative work.

Yesterday evening replied to Sid Smith's request re the King Crimson improvisation 'Daniel Dust' included as part of 'The Great Deceiver' collection. Found one or two interesting things about this:

'Daniel Dust' is an anacrusis-like improvisation for electric guitar, violin, bass guitar and snare-drum to 'The Night Watch' which follows-on immediately in this instance (Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, April 29th. 1974).

The melodic/motivic material plays around the pitches A (pitch-class 0), B (2), C# (4), E (7) and F# (9). There is particular weight placed on the motive B - A (2 - 0), and F# - E (9 - 7). An occasional D natural (5) is included which gives the impression of a suspension, but it isn't used AS a suspension.

The harmony consists of A major with added notes (usually F# and B natural) which is, essentially, pentatonic over a long A natural pedal/drone. The harmony oscillates between the tonic A major, and the subdominant D major over the pedal A.

The bass guitar, and then snare-drum, enter near the end, adding to the climax, and here the guitar part begins to add 'rogue pitches': notes foreign to the mode, such as a striking C natural (3). The harmony is also intensified with a striking moment of chord IV/I (D/A) with a dissonant G natural (10) close to the end, which reinforces the climax, before a not-too-gradual liquidation. Segue - 'The Night Watch'.

6 03/17/2000 Worked on the piece for several hours yesterday. Wrote a short cello solo to link section one with section two, and considerable weeding of the texture of the first section. By 16-00 wiped-out. Then as I lay in bed last night, further ideas dropped into the head: 'if the first line of the song is played throughout the first section, why not the second line? So the whole of the first section becomes an elaboration, and a huge anacrusis to the song of the second section.' Now, at last, it's clarifying, and not before time. One cannot rush the 'spirit'. Also a new title dropped in as I read another essay (David Michael Levin's 'Eros and Psyche'). Still feel unhappy with the former title, mainly because it's derivative. There now exists a complete sketch, and once this stage is reached I always feel a lot happier. The next stage is the write-up and then the dreaded writing-up of parts, although once I get into it then it's fine. Just the thought of the long, long slog. I'm now beginning to see the sense in using a computer notation package: it would help enormously at this stage. But, no time to learn at the moment. Perhaps over the summer?

Home to answer several e-mails, and then straight into checking the bar-numbering of 'Nekyia'. Manage to cover the flute/piccolo, soprano saxophone, clarinet, bass clarinet, bassoon/contra-bassoon parts. Finish by 22-00. On with the brass parts today. Once the piano quartet is complete then copy the harp and string parts. The piece once had a much larger string section, but this was reduced to one which suits a very large chamber ensemble (3-3-2-2-1).

Mum says she went out for an hour yesterday, and returned to find my father sweeping the path. We feel it's probably best to allow him to do jobs around the house. Sue feels it may also be good therapy.

5 03/16/2000 A good day in Liverpool yesterday, sharing various works by Bartok with the students. 'Concerto for Orchestra' is an impressive piece: the second movement where each 'couple' of instruments concentrates on a particular interval (flutes in perfect 5ths, trumpets in major seconds etc.), and the brilliant orchestration of the final movement sound magnificent. Also played two Bartok piano pieces: 'Bagpipers' (from the Sonatine) and No. 153, 'Bulgarian Dance' No. 5, from Mikrokosmos VI.

In the morning and evening worked further on the piece. 'Climbing the Sky' seems to reflect what is going on in the music (i.e. it ascends throughout like a Schenkerian Urlinie). Definitely sticking with the two distinct sections - fast/slow. Had several ideas on the train: a) make the F#/C# motive into an accompaniment; b)write a short solo cello passage to join the first half to the second; c) discoverd two chords fitted into context with two other chords and can be juxtaposed, and repeated again in other contexts. Forgot my notebook (stupid thing to do) and had to write ideas down on the back of an old receipt.

Also read several essays in Ed. Roger Brooke: Pathways in to the Jungian World (Routledge - 2000). One of them was excellent: 'Eros and Chaos: the mysteries and shadows of love', by Veronica Goodchild. Briefly continued with the Bentley Layton book last evening. Covered 'Zostrianos' and 'The Foreigner', both books which deal with 'interior mystical journeys'.

Sat in the Lady Chapel in Liverpool Metropolitan Cathedral. Lit a candle.

Dad is fine at home. The Occupational Therapist visited yesterday and my father has promised to attend the Day Hospital for help with his speech. My mother went to the Dentist and when she arrived back he had been naughty: he'd climbed to the top of the house and changed a lightbulb. However, it looks as if the Social Services are putting everything in place, and have offered to help in every way possible.

4 03/15/2000 Had some free time yesterday morning during which the piano quartet piece took on new guises. Seriously thinking of scrapping the idea of a fast recapitulation. Perhaps a fast recapitulation goes over the same old ground again, as in some of my other pieces? Instead, why not finish it using the slow music? The structure then falls into two clearly defined sections: fast/slow. It could work. Spend time listening inwardly... . Also, the title may not be right. The piece feels like a journey, or an 'escape': the first half has an urgency about it, and the second something found - the goal attained. Briefly look at the piece again this morning before travelling to Liverpool. There is only the remainder of the week left, and perhaps a little of next week, to get this absolutely right. The piece then has to be copied in to fair-score.

Succeeded in Xeroxing copies of solo part and score of the Concerto. Post these today. Also 'moderated' a student's exam portfolio.

Whilst teaching a student at around 17-20 Sue came to school looking rather worried. My mother had left a message on her mobile-phone: 'Dad has signed himself out of hospital. What am I to do?' So, last evening was a rush-around to see exactly what had happened. My Dad was missing home, and was due out of hospital on Friday anyway. The hospital staff told me on the phone that he couldn't be restrained, packed his belongings and left! Fortunately, my mother and sister were just outside in the car after visiting hours. My mother is worried how she is going to cope with him at home, and was in a bit of a state when we arrived. If he had stayed then Social Services would have seen to everything. As it stands, this may not be the case. We must wait and see. However, we managed to reassure my mother telling her the hospital had sent a note to the local G.P. telling him what had happened, and listing all the tablets my father requires. The situation should clarify today. However, I can't see there is a major problem: my father has returned home slightly ealier than anticipated. It feels as if the past few weeks have been, for us as a family, something of a dark time.

3 03/14/2000 Last evening returned to find e-mail waiting from Evelyn Glennie's office: 'please send further two copies of solo part for Concerto "Nekyia", and please mark stave reference for the drums.' This was written and completed at 22-00.

'Nekyia' is a word meaning 'night sea-journey'. It's an archetypal motif found in many cultures, depicting a journey of a hero-figure, who is usually swallowed by a sea-monster, taken in the belly of the monster from west to east, before being spat-out onto dry land: this is regarded as a resurrection, of sorts. I've used the idea as a metaphor for the journey of the percussionist around the various instruments, before being 'swallowed' by the ensemble to the back of the stage where the drums are placed. This is the moment of conflict during the piece. The percussionist eventually returns to the front of the stage (the resurrention section) from whence she came, for the recapitulation played on the marimba, vibes, tubular bells, crotales and tam-tams.

Continued with 'Climbing the Sky'. Interesting moment reached when final ideas begin to flood the mind. Also, is the title right? This ALWAYS happens: there is always conflict over the title. For me, titles must reflect multi-levels of meaning. One thing is certain: the piece climbs throughout Virelai's song, 'Sad steps', is quoted in full. Is this nostalgia, or Gnostalgia? One thing is also certain: this piece is much more direct, more accessible (the requirements of the commission have been fulfilled) and more audience-friendly. I wonder if it marks, for me, the ongoing tendency towards a compositional denuding process? Will probably react, in due course, with something really gritty. Hate cliche.

Dad has, again, made progress. He was in fine spirits yesterday. Looks like he's coming home soon, according to the Occupational Therapist. Good news.

Returning along the Promenade, there were thousands of Starlings flying over Blackpool's North Pier, joined by thousands more. Around a month ago a dream: 'I'm driving with a student (R.N.) towards the sea. Thousands of Cormorants are returning, diving towards the land, but making the sky black. They land in a field, and we go and look at them.' Yesterday was a synchronistic moment. (Also on Sunday, in the Stannah shop, noticed there was a carving of a Cormorant on sale). R.N. is also having difficulty sustaining a more dissonant musical language. 'Be true to thine own self.' How often has the unconscious been 'wrong' as compared with being 'right'? Best to take note.

2 03/13/2000 Much of yesterday spent weeding-out and obliterating sections of 'Climbing the Sky'. Two breaks: first accompanying in the Music Competition, followed by short Xeroxing session of 'Concerto Nekyia', which Diego wants a copy of, and then a short walk around Scorton. Saturated by 20-30 so relaxed for the rest of the evening. Back to 'Climbing...' today.

E-mails form Jacob Holm-Lupo saying the new White Willow album is almost complete, and replied to Scott re recording of the Soundscape orchestrations. E-mailed Diane re Soundscape orchestration project. Kevin also phoned after returning from Malta. Andrew Bass e-mailed last week asking if it would be possible to include something from my York lecture on the Diary. I'll try and write something when time allows.

Dad is much better. He is walking without the aid of a walking-stick and it looks highly likely that his speech will return completely in time. Call in to see him today and then go and prune the roses.

7 03/11/2000 To Manchester. Teaching, or rather 'instructing', from 9-30 - 14-30. The students continue to produce excellent work, and the '9-30 Group' have developed the collective piece even more. Last week they introduced a Tibetan Singing Bowl into it, so it is now a piece for piano, double-bass, percussion and...Tibetan Singing Bowl! My function in the creation of a piece like this is to stand back and make occasional suggestions. This morning I made two, which were reasonably well received. One learns to shut up rather than intrude on students' compositional processes in a situation such as this. I am privileged to be involved with the RNCM Junior School. Some other very promising pieces are coming through. Return to find a letter saying the Lord Rhodes romm has been booked for a further rehearsal for the May 20th Young Composers' concert.

On the train journeys read 'The Revelation of Adam', 'The Reality of the Rulers', 'The Thunder-Perfect Intellect' and started 'First Thought in Three Forms'. This edition of the Gnostic Scriptures are clearly annotated and helpful in explaining origins/possible interpretations of the obscure passages. Particularly drawn to the passage, 'For your interior is your exterior...And what you see outside of you, you see inside of you.' Synchronicity? Whatever, 'The Thunder-Perfect Intellect' is a worthy description of the Jungian definition of the anima.

This evening we visit my father, then back to continue with a little more of 'Climbing the Sky'. Also work on the Gluck and Telemann for tomorrow's Music Competition. Fortunately, these are not difficult pieces to play.

Today managed to sit on my glasses. Twisted metal at first, but eventually manipulated them back into shape. Something is wrong: the line of vision is out.

E-mail from Scott re recording of Soundscape orchestrations. Everything looks on course for...? Details to be finalised, but it looks promising.

6 03/10/2000 Taught till 15-00, and then visited my father in the hospital where he's been moved to. He's much recovered, his speech is returning and he's walking with a stick. He continually reminded me that it's Sue's and my turn to visit him tomorrow evening, as well as saying, 'Put lime down on the soil before you plant the flowers.'

A few minutes back on 'Climbing the Sky' this morning. Added an extra bar in the introduction for the sake of structural balance more than anything else. This will be reviewed quite fully next week when time allows. The May 5th deadline will soon come around. However, in essence, it's more or less there.

Heard today about another Composer who has received an astronomical fee for a commissioned piece. Driving home I thought carefully about this. Speaking for myself, I have to say that I do accept fees for pieces, but sometimes feel that fees have to be waived: I've had the experience when writing for money can hinder the creative process. How many concerts have I attended when new pieces (often high-profile commissions) have been performed which are impact-less in every way. I hold with Gurdjieff's view, and Jung's to some extent, about 'objective' and 'subjective' art. It's a fact that very often music, of which the public is completely unaware, is able to convey the 'unconscious' dimension in a profound, and succinct way. It's as though obscurity is almost a pre-requisite for conveying an 'objectivity' or 'otherness'. Not always, but more often than not. This has been my experience, and it is one I continue to rejoice in and hold fast to. Someone once said: 'Work hard...for nothing a year.' Was it Charles Dickens?

5 03/09/2000 A very good day, and a thoroughly enjoyable experience in York with the students of 'progressive' rock, John Potter (The Hilliard Ensemble) and Sid Smith. The lecture seemed to go smoothly, with several interesting questions from students at the end, plus an interesting seminar from two students on Pink Floyd.

Lunch with John and Sid in the Student Union building. I was also knocked out with Sid's work which he brought along to show me: paintings he'd worked on whilst listening to my pieces.

Bus into York, farewell to Sid and manage to find Sue. To Banks's Music Shop to buy CD of the Bartok Piano Sonatine for Liverpool next week, then coffee and cakes. The traffic is getting worse in this quaint, old city. Something will have to be done about it.

Return by around 20-30, to find messages from John Powell of Bolton Chamber Choir with queries about my new piece which the choir began rehearsing last evening. Phone John. Also from Trinity College Contemporary Music Group, requesting a score of my concerto 'Nekyia' for the conductor Diego Masson. The piece is premiered in London in November by the ensemble with Evelyn Glennie as soloist. The thing which struck me is this: it's strange how, with the lecture past today, that energy suddenly reverts back to composition. Chance? Again, I suppose it's to do with how we define that word. I prefer to think of a possible explanation in terms of 'sychronicity'.

4 03/08/2000 Today there is no teaching in Liverpool as it's 'reading week' at the University. Today was spent resting which feels unusual, but nice. Sue and I went to Preston, looked around the Harris Museum and Art Gallery - something we do from time to time as it's a very reasonable venue for local interest (archeaology etc.) - and had a nice lunch.

Bought Air's soundtrack to the film 'The Virgin Suicides' as recommended by Jacob Holm-Lupo. Jacob and I have both felt, independently from one another, that we should work together at some point in the future, though exactly when that will be, and what form it may take, is uncertain as we're both very busy at the moment with various projects. Still, this is an exciting prospect and something to look forward to.

Bert Lams phoned to say he's begun another Soundscape, this time an unfamiliar and unreleased one. The project is reaching the point when recording is beginning to look as though it may become a distinct reality.

A very early start tomorrow for the drive to York. All the materials are prepared. I hope I can retain a certain composure, as I am NOT a public speaker. However, the March Calendar has the words: 'At this point my life is one learning experience after another. By the end of the month I should be a genius.' I accept the first part of this, but not the second.

Looking forward to returning to work on 'Climbing the Sky' which must be completed soonish, as the remainder of term looks set to be really frantic.

Completed reading 'The Apocryphon of John' last night in the Bentley Layton edition of The Gnostic Scriptures.

No hospital visiting today.

3 03/07/2000 Feel much more positive about my father's health after visiting him this evening. He's been moved into another part of the hospital ward, and is much happier. He told us to 'prune the roses', 'trim the hedge' and to ask Nicholas and Christopher to help, too! The next move for him will be a move to a regional hospital. He's made a remarkable recovery, mainly because he hasn't given up but has decided to return to the land of the living.

Nicholas and Christopher both phoned to say they've passed their exams, and to see how Grandad is.

Today put the finishing touches to the lecture, by Xeroxing fifty hand-outs, and the only thing remaining is to Xerox some acetates for use with OHP. Listened to 'Paranoid Android' today: I have an idea that Porcupine Tree, the Landberk of 'Indian Summer' and Radiohead point the way ahead for a self-conscious realisation of 'progressive' music, which seems to me to be more about the stripping-back of rhetoric. In this music I hear Britpop alive and kicking, fused with all the usual musics involved in the 'prog' dimension but somehow flattened-out. I think 'Paranoid Android' is really rather good: it has an aggression about it and a real emotional intensity. However, I'm not a real expert: simply an interested party.

Taught all day, and rehearsed pieces with students for the Music Competition on Sunday. No time today to get at 'Climbing the Sky'. This will be revisted in earnest next week. Bought two new pads of 20 Stave MS yesterday on which to write it into fair-score, whenever that process should begin.

2 03/06/2000 A day of accompanying Associated Board students. My piano skills just about reach to this, and today the Examiner was also being moderated by someone else which made the experience a little more interesting.

Went to see Mum to check if the hedge needs cutting, transport an electric radiator downstairs for her etc. The Social Services have to check my parents' house to see how my father is going to cope when he finally arrives home.

Re-wrote bits and pieces of the notes for Thurday's lecture, and must prepare the MS's for the OHP tomorrow. Nothing too elaborate, but it all needs to be clear. More on that tonight after hospital visiting. Listened further to Volare, and White Willow. 'Ex Tenebris' is just VERY good. It functions well as a work, and as I listened to 'Dance of Shadows' this morning discovered an example of prime and retrograde forms not of a serial note-row, as far as a superficial listening goes, but at least of a thematic mirror which, of course, fits the title exactly. Small details in pieces such as this always excite me. Analyse this tonight, also.

May have a few moments tomorrow to return to 'Climbing the Sky'. The lay-off has provided a period of reflection: the first requirement is a good textural thinning-out, followed by development of the opening ascending F#-G#-A-B-C# motif which gardually ascends, as the piece proceeds, to cover three octaves (to C# ''') by the end.

A very mild day, with lots of Spring flowers emerging, and good spells of sunshine. Noticed a beautiful garden full of Daffodils etc. as I drove through Wary Green this afternoon. Sat in the lane, ate lunch and listened to bits of White Willow, Soltice and Volare.

1 03/05/2000 Awoke early and typed some more material for the lecture: a chronology. Last evening listened to David Sylvian's 'Dead Bees on a Cake', and today listened to Volare's 'The Uncertainty Principle'. The latter owes something to Hatfield and the North and the Mahavishnu Orchestra. I now have something of a play-list for Thursday: Marillion, Solstice (perhaps), Spock's Beard (perhaps), White Willow, Peter Hammill, David Sylvian (perhaps), Volare (perhaps), Ozric Tentacles, Tim Hodgkinson, Lindsay Cooper, Thinking Plague and Porcupine Tree. There will be one or two pieces dealt with in some depth (White Willow, Peter Hammill and Porcupine Tree), while the remainder will be briefly surveyed. Also plan to play some AOR-releated material by Asia and Yes (90125) as a way into the 'neo-progressive' area.

Sid e-mailed asking for Thursday's schedule. (You do not know how valuable the Macan book has been, Sid! Thanks for asking Shaun to send it.)

Drove to the Lake District today and climbed Loughrigg from the Grasmere side. Gathering, grey clouds although it didn't rain. Excellent visibility. Freezing conditions on top of the fell, with a very high wind-chill factor. Views from the summit: Lonscale Fell to the north with a slight snow covering; the Coniston Fells to the west, also snow-covered; the Fairfield Horseshoe to the east, with a good view of the ridge on Great Rigg and Heron Pike leading up to Fairfield, and Windermere to the south with sun on Wansfell towering over Ambleside. Immediate foreground: Helm Crag towering over Grasmere with Ullscarf just behind and Silver Howe. Last season's bracken is dead and brittle, covering the fells in an orange blanket. On the descent further ways to develop ideas for 'Climbing the Sky' enter head. No need to write them down: locked in the memory.

Brother-in-law Chris had bought Dad a book on Staffordshire which he's been reading. This has been of great help, helping him to relate back to his, and our, past. Lots of black and white photos of the locality: Lichfield Cathedral, Tutbury Hall, Abbots Bromley etc. Dad continues to make good progress. The Speech Therapist is showing him how to pronounce vowels and has left a list, together with mouth-shapes, for him to work on.

7 03/04/2000 Return from Manchester at 15-40. Had a meeting with K. M., my colleague in the RNCM Junior School Composition Dept., about the Young Composers' Concert on May 20th, which we've been asked to organise. Both feel that an extra rehearsal is necessary the week before as there are more pieces to be listened to/rehearsed than expected. There is a Fugue, an ensemble piece, duets for various instruments, piano solos, a string quartet, a collective piece by various students, a piece for oboe and string quartet etc., etc.

Last night listened to Paul Creston's Concertino for marimba, and marked a student fugue.

Managed to write up more notes for the 'progressive' lecture on the way to Manchester this morning. Last night also listened to Tim Hodgkinson, Lindsay Cooper and Thinking Plague which will be dealt with very briefly: an hour and a half is not long to concentrate on everything in the 'neo-progressive' domain, except for around three specialities (White Willow, Peter Hammill and Porcupine Tree) which have been singled out mainly because I like the music. I've also been asked to leave out King Crimson as their music is being dealt with by a guest speaker, who will be in a position to articulate their contribution more precisely than I ever could hope to do.

Also read 'Dark Flame - Songs of Remembrance', a book of poetry and writings by Jacob Holm-Lupo of White Willow. Jacob very kindly sent the book in the post, with a dedication: '...for Andrew - fellow sojourner'. What more is there to say except, 'thank you and the poems are beautiful, and appeal to me greatly'. They also have a function outside the merely technical: to re-member. Our mutual interests in Gnosticism and Jung have led to an exciting and meaningful exchange of correspondence over the past week.

T.H. gave me the first section of her new novel this a.m. which I plan to read during the hols. T. wrote the poetry I set for my song-cycle, 'Fruit Tree (Nick Drake remembered)', late 1998.

Dad is improving and we visit him again this evening. My mother said that he may be going home earlier than any of us expected when we spoke last evening. We are all pleased about the amazing progress he's making. The hospital staff are calling him their 'star patient'!

Strange dream (visitation of the anima) last night which was mirrored on the outside early today. As one famous poet once said: 'I had a dream/What does it mean?' Could it be something to do with my piece 'Climbing the Sky' work, on which, resumes later next week?

6 03/03/2000 This week has been exhausting, and I'm pleased it is Friday. One more day to go, and then a rest on Sunday. Managed to write up more notes and do a little more research yesterday for the 'progressive' lecture, this time on Marillion. Also wrote up the brief section on Peter Hammill, and later today will listen to Solstice and IQ, as an overview of '80's 'progressive'.

Photocopied and bound 'Black Light' yesterday. Score and parts launched. Came across errors in the original which were revised accordingly. Spent two hours cutting, sticking and glueing the parts onto MS, after photocopying the fair-score a number of times. This is a cheat-method, resorted to in times of frantic activity, for realising parts without actually copying them out from the score. Still exhausting work.

Dad continues to make an excellent recovery. Once the hospital have sorted ou various problems, over the next few days, they have implied that he may be able to return home or be moved to a a more local hospital in the area for convalescence. He seemed in good spirits last evening when we visited, but was trying to tell us something we couldn't grasp. The main problem, as I see it, is one of fustration: he cannot make himself understood. However, he did tell us the the Speech Therapist is visiting him on a daily basis.

Last night's bedtime reading was Philip Barford's BBC Music Guide on Mahler, which I was led to after marking a very acceptable student essay. Plan to listen to Mahler 8 sometime shortly. Interested in the Goethe aspect of this work, and how Mahler manages to fuse the masculine Veni Creator Spiritus, of the first half, with the more feminine second half in a search for wholeness or complete redemption. Individuation? Listened to this work many years ago, so will have to dig out my old vinyl copy.

5 03/02/2000 Dad is making a remarkable recovery. His powers of speech are returning, and he can now say simple words again. He walked to the bathroom two evenings ago. But he is very frustrated, because he can't communicate at speed. He was trying to tell us something last night by looking at newspaper to locate the word. It will be a long period of recovery.

E-mails for Sid Smith saying he'll bring his paintings (inspired by my pieces) to York. Also an e-mail from Jacob Holm-Lupo re new White Willow music, as well as sending me information about the new Steely Dan record and useful information about Porcupine Tree. Iain Cameron e-mailed re my dad's condition, and Jeffrey Fayman made contact. Thanks to you all.

Today teaching, and assembly of the parts of 'Black Light'. Then to hospital, more on the lecture (I listened to Ozric Tentacles last evening) and marking an essay on Mahler.

4 03/01/2000 Checked the fair-score of 'Black Light' for errors in notation, and to see if the doublings work. All seems in order, and it seems to sound reasonable internally against the piano. It will be photocopied tomorrow, the parts assembled and sent to Opus 20 on Friday, all being well.

Today is the Liverpool teaching day, so it will soon be time to hit the road or, rather, the tracks. It takes around an hour and a half to get to Liverpool Lime Street station from Poulton, followed by a half-mile walk up the hill to the University. The journey will be spent reading the Macan book, which is almost complete. There is still quite an amount to organise for the lecture, and the Macan book has been very useful. Thanks again, Sid!

Jacob Holm-Lupo, of White Willow, phoned last evening from Norway. We had an excellent chat for around an hour (his phone-bill must be sky-high) about many different things - both musical and philosophical. Of all the groups I've researched recently White Willow's Ex Tenebris stands out from the rest, mainly because of Jacob's attention to fine detail in terms of arrangements, the strength of the melodic lines coupled with the unusual harmony, and the structure and pacing of the whole. I look forward with eager anticipation to White Willow's third album.

On arrival back at Poulton this evening we drive to see Dad in hospital.